Archive for category UE Staff Rants

Unemployment In Pie Form: Tasty AND Depressing

Well, we balked on a couple deadlines but have finally finished compiling data from roughly one hundred of our readers, friends and ex-peers. Why are the pretty ones always so lazy?

At any rate, we asked our small focus group six questions, and have now charted out their answers for your consumption. We could qualify the responses, or provide some analysis of our own… but admittedly, we like to throw numbers out there and see what kind of chaos ensues. Seems to be a popular trend nowadays.

Enjoy!

How long was(is) your unemployment period?

About how many jobs have you applied to per month?

How many applications does it take to get one interview?

If you've received a job offer, how many interviews did it take to get one?

What kind of feedback have you heard when denied for a position?

How much of a pay cut did (would) you take for a new position?

Tags: , ,

UberEmployable And Alltop, Sitting In A Tree

We know it’s been a few days since our last post, but there are two very good reasons for the lackadaisicalness (or is it lackadaisicality?):

1. We’ve been compiling some interesting data on some of our unemployed readers and friends… you’ll be able to romp around in these sweet charts and graphs later on today.

2. The UberEmployable team is now 100% employed! We had to focus on getting job-related crap done over the past few days, but fear not: we will continue our quest as the Robin Hood of the jobless. Whatever that means.

And in other news, UberEmployable was recently accepted into the ranks of Alltop.com – an online aggregator of the best blogs and news feeds on the web. Our stomping ground on Alltop is the Jobs (Not Steve) section, so do us a solid and stop on over there!

Tags: ,

Nominee: Best First Impression Of The Year

I would like to nominate myself for “Best First Impression Of The Year”, as witnessed during a phone interview I had today. Ah, the wonders of poor-quality cellphone reception.

“Hello, this is Mitch.”

“Hi Mitch, this is _____. I heard through a mutual friend that you have expertise in social media marketing and were available to consult. Is this a good time for you?”

“I have to apologize actually – my battery’s dying so I’ll have to take down your contact info and get back to you.”

“Your daughter?!?!”

“Pardon?”

“What?”

“My daughter?”

“You said your daughter is dying??”

“Wait, what? Oh no no no… battery. My battery is dying.”

“Oh. Wow.”

Think your first impression beats this one? Leave your story in the comments!

Tags: ,

UberEmployable Takes It To The Streets

UberMoo. Our promo materials from MOO Cards!

Just to show everyone that us Internet geeks aren’t afraid of a little offline marketing (say it with us now: off… line…), we’ve printed up some promotional materials with a little help from MOO Cards.

We bought up a couple hundred “MiniCards” with our wordmark on the front and the usual slogan on the back, and we’re not afraid to use ‘em! Don’t be surprised if you spy these floating around New York City or Pittsburgh at bars, sporting events, off-track-betting vestibules… you know, all the places us unemployed folk love to hang out ;)

MOO is a great resource for high-quality, fast and easy printwork by the way. They were even kind enough to dole out a couple of promotional codes for 15% off your first purchase, so if any of you readers would like to take this opportunity to do some self-promotion, contact us and we’ll happily pass a promo code along to you!

Tags: , ,

Employers, Wake Up: It’s a Buyer’s Market

We all know how the real estate market works. Sometimes, it’s a seller’s market: prices are bloated, the economy is great, and buyers are beating eachother up in the front yard to be the first offer. Other times, it’s a buyer’s market. Well, the job market is no different.

In poor economic times, the supply of jobs is low and demand is high. That means it’s a buyer’s market for employers and companies, who can choose from dozens of qualified candidates and hold all the aces in salary negotiations. So, employers must really be cashing in right now, correct?

Mmm… not so much. Let’s take a look at three reasons why.

1. Job candidates being reviewed and qualified by disinterested staff. Who reads and sends along resumes at your company? Is it the jaded office clerk who can’t wait for 5:00pm to roll around? The opportunity-squashing HR manager whose primary duty is to prevent risk in the workplace? The overworked executive assistant who has to prioritize things like resume reviews all the way off his/her plate just to make sure the rest of the work gets done in a day? Sounds like a recipe for hiring success.

2. Management looking to cut expenses, not incur new ones. Times are tough for businesses too, not just individuals. What Manager in his/her right mind would approach the big boss with a proposal for new hires when the company just completed a 20% layoff initiative? The Manager who understands cost efficiency, that’s who. In many positions, a highly talented individual can absorb tasks from low-level personnel or vendors, which saves the company money. A great sales or marketing professional will generate significantly more money than they take home. An applicant who really needs the gig will work for less than his/her counterparts, which makes the employer look like a financial wizard once the economy comes back around. Listen carefully employers… there’s gold in them there hills.

3. Inability to grasp the obvious: great people make great companies. Sports teams have talent scouts. Do you know why they have talent scouts? Because they’re smart. They know that great talent – while hard to find – can produce amazing results for the team. They also know that finding talented individuals who have been overlooked by other teams means getting a great deal on someone who is eager to prove him/herself. As someone who was previously in charge of new hires, I can’t stress enough the importance of having your staff not only pay utmost attention to incoming resumes, but also take the initiative to seek out talented individuals looking for work. Chances are, there’s someone out there right now who could take your business to the next level…

Tags: ,

Welcome To UberEmployable.com

After long nights spent toiling over our computers (just kidding – we ate Fruity Pebbles and screwed around all day), we are proud to present UberEmployable.com: a resource for all the professionals whose talents have been lost amidst a sea of resumes in this, the most horrendous job market in recent memory.

Call it a talent pool, a support group, or just a place to vent about how tough it is for experienced and capable people to find work right now. Our goal is to find the “UberEmployables” of America, and showcase their profiles on our blog. If word spreads far enough, you may find employers looking to this site for job candidates… but if not, at least you’ll see that you’re not the only person whose talents are going to waste.

Going forward, check our blog (or our Twitter account) frequently for new UberEmployable profiles being posted, as well as some tips on maximizing your downtime and unemployment, along with general advice and commentary from our staff on the state of the job market.

Think you’re an UberEmployable? Submit your profile to us here and we might showcase you with your very own blog post for all the virtual world to see. Can we get an amen from the congregation? Amen.

Tags: , , ,